I recently facilitated a workshop with our outpatient folks (I work in substance abuse recovery) and we were using the Windows of Connection worksheet. This was my first time using this worksheet, and I was drawn to the question that it raised, “How has the connection to yourself changed as you have explored the strength within you?” This question provoked a lot of thought and internal dialogue. “What is my strength?” “How can I get more connected to IT if I don’t know what IT is?” And “If I had a superpower, what would it be?”
As a person in long term recovery from heroin addiction, homelessness and PTSD from my military service I have had to overcome a lot of obstacles to get to where I am today. I started to think that maybe growth could be my super power. Back then, I had enough willingness to try just about anything to get my life back. That foundation of complete willingness has been the greatest gift. It opened my mind to the possibilities of what could be. It also exposed a lot of limiting beliefs I had about myself, like “I’m not worthy” and “I don’t deserve to be loved.” I started to explore ideas like “Why not me?” and “I too, deserve to be happy.” The seed of willingness was planted and so my journey of personal growth had begun.
I learned about something called PTGS or post traumatic growth syndrome. What I found out was that there are people in the world who have had traumatic experiences, but rather than allow those experiences to define them, they were able to learn and grow from them. This realization opened my mind to the possibility that I too could grow and change as a result of my trauma. I started to see the world in a very different way. What used to be problems for me became opportunities for growth and I was able to reframe those experiences in a way that they became my greatest asset. I learned that my life had purpose and that helping others who had been through similar experiences was exactly what I needed to grow. Facilitating Windows workshops gave me a way to do that.
In my drawing, the tree is growing on top of a mountain, which is a very tough place for a seed to even get to, much less take root and grow. Yet that is me. Growing and thriving in the most inhospitable circumstances. With Windows, I can help others find their way to this place on top of their own mountain. Where they can grow and thrive in the fresh mountain air and see the sun rise and set from the best views on any given day.
